Coaching a Peer Through Tough Feedback

mentorshipMid10–15 min
How to Use This: Run this roleplay with 1–2 people, or try it solo by voicing each role. Introduce curveballs for added complexity. Reflect afterward to evaluate strengths and areas for improvement.

Roleplay Scenario

Scenario Overview

A peer has received some unexpected feedback from a recent 360-review, and it's hitting them hard. Your role is to help them process this feedback, see its potential benefits, and create a plan for improvement, all while being supportive and positive. This scenario emphasizes empathy, listening, and working together to find solutions.

Roles & Setup

Role A – Mentor (You)
You are guiding your peer through the feedback process.
Your goal: Help them see the feedback as a chance to grow and find ways to improve together.

Role B – Peer
You’ve received some tough feedback and are feeling discouraged.
Your goal: Understand the feedback and figure out how to improve.

Suggested Openers

Mentor:

  • “Hey, I heard you got some feedback that’s been tough. Want to chat about it and see how we can make it work for you?”
  • “Feedback can be tricky. Let’s go through it and come up with a plan that helps you move forward.”

Peer:

  • “I’m having a hard time with the feedback I got. It feels harsh, and I’m not sure what to do next.”
  • “I thought I was doing well, but this feedback has really thrown me off balance. Can you help me work through it?”

Sample Roleplay in Action

Mentor:
“Hey, I heard you got some feedback that’s been tough to deal with. Want to talk about it and figure out what we can do?”

Peer:
“Yeah, that’d be great. The feedback said I’m not working well with the team, but I didn’t think that was an issue. It’s really got me second-guessing myself.”

Mentor:
“Got it. It’s hard when feedback doesn’t match what we expect. Can you give me some details on what they said?”

Peer:
“They mentioned I tend to take over in meetings and don’t give others much room to speak. I didn’t realize that was happening.”

Mentor:
“Thanks for sharing. Sometimes our enthusiasm can come across differently. Maybe we can think of ways to make sure everyone gets a chance to contribute in meetings?”

Peer:
“That could work. I could start by asking others for their thoughts more often or setting an agenda that includes everyone’s input.”

Mentor:
“That sounds like a solid plan. How about we touch base after you try this out a few times and see how it’s going?”

Peer:
“That sounds good. Thanks for helping me see this in a new light and turning it into something I can work on.”

Mentor:
“Anytime. Remember, feedback is a tool for growth, and you’re already taking steps in the right direction. Let’s catch up in a couple of weeks to check on your progress.”

Post-Scenario Tools

Curveball Mode (Optional)

Add complexity by introducing one of these challenges mid-roleplay:

  • Feedback includes vague or conflicting points that need clarification.
  • Peer becomes more defensive or emotional during the discussion.
  • A new piece of feedback arrives during the conversation.

Reflection Checklist

As the Mentor:

  • Did you listen attentively and with empathy?
  • Did you help your peer view feedback as a chance to grow?
  • Did you work together to create actionable steps?

As the Peer:

  • Did you express your feelings honestly?
  • Did you stay open to seeing the feedback as constructive?
  • Did you participate in creating an action plan?

Common Mistakes to Avoid

  • Jumping to conclusions without understanding the feedback fully
  • Offering solutions without involving the peer
  • Ignoring emotional responses and focusing only on logic

Pro Tip

Feedback should be a conversation, not a lecture. Encourage open dialogue and focus on how the feedback can lead to growth, keeping the conversation positive and future-oriented.