Introduction: What You’ll Learn
This simulation helps you facilitate a 1:1 that centers on feedback — from team surveys, peer comments, or direct observations. Your goal is to create clarity, not defensiveness.
You’ll practice:
- Sharing feedback without sounding accusatory
- Focusing on patterns instead of isolated incidents
- Framing growth opportunities with empathy
- Co-creating a path forward together
Step-by-Step Simulation
Scene 1: Opening the Feedback Conversation
You (Manager):
"Hey, I’ve been doing a bit of feedback gathering lately — just informal check-ins across the team. There were a couple themes that came up I thought would be good to reflect on together."
Teammate (Jordan):
"Oh? Okay... is it bad stuff?"
You:
"Not bad — just some patterns that might be useful for your growth. And to be clear, it’s stuff that’s been coming up here and there — nothing out of left field, and we can explore it together."
Scene 2: Naming Feedback Gently
You:
"One theme that came up was around code reviews — a couple folks said your comments can feel a bit blunt sometimes. I know your intent is to help, and your reviews are thoughtful — but the tone has landed a little sharp to a few teammates."
Jordan:
"Hmm. I didn’t realize that. I’ve just been trying to be direct."
You:
"Totally makes sense. Directness is a strength — this is more about how it’s received. Even a small tone shift could help your feedback land better — you might not need to change what you’re saying, just how it’s coming across."
Scene 3: Turning Feedback into Action
You:
"Would it be helpful to look at a few recent reviews together next week — just to spot any tone that could be softened? We could even look at how others phrase similar feedback."
Jordan:
"Yeah, that would help. I really didn’t mean to come off that way."
You:
"I know you didn’t. That’s why I wanted to talk about it — because you care, and a small shift here could really boost your impact."
Jordan:
"Thanks for flagging it. I’ll try to be more mindful."
You:
"Appreciate that. And if there’s ever feedback for me too — I always want to hear it. Let’s keep this a two-way thing."
Mini Roleplay Challenges
Challenge 1:
Jordan gets defensive or brushes it off.
- Best Response:
“I totally get how this might feel unexpected — and I know your intentions are good. Want to talk through what’s surprising about it?”
Challenge 2:
Jordan wants names or examples.
- Best Response:
“I want to respect trust here — it’s more about the pattern than any one comment. Happy to talk through specific phrasing if that helps.”
Challenge 3:
Jordan disagrees with the feedback.
- Best Response:
“That’s okay — it’s just something I’ve heard more than once, so I wanted to bring it to you directly. We can work through it together.”
Optional Curveball Mode
- Jordan already received similar feedback before and is frustrated it’s still coming up.
- They feel like others are too sensitive and shouldn’t need softened language.
- They overcorrect and start avoiding feedback altogether.
Reflection Checklist
Clarity & Empathy
- Did I deliver the feedback in a clear and kind way?
- Did I focus on the pattern and not a single incident?
Coaching Mindset
- Did I assume good intent and acknowledge strengths?
- Did I offer partnership in next steps, not just critique?
Ongoing Trust
- Did I invite two-way feedback?
- Did I leave space for emotions or disagreement?
Common Mistakes to Avoid
- Delivering feedback too bluntly or all at once
- Naming individuals or specific moments unnecessarily
- Ignoring the teammate’s emotional response
- Making it a one-time event instead of part of a growth process