Mentoring for Confidence Building

mentorshipMid10–15 min
How to Use This: Run this roleplay with 1–2 people, or try it solo by voicing each role. Add curveballs to test adaptability. Reflect afterward to see what approaches were most effective.

Roleplay Scenario

Scenario Overview

You’re a mentor having a one-on-one with a junior engineer who’s been struggling with confidence. They’ve been hesitant to take on new challenges and often second-guess their decisions. Your goal is to help them recognize their strengths and build confidence without sounding dismissive or overly critical.

Roles & Setup

Role A – Mentor (You)
You’re leading the one-on-one session.
Your goal: Encourage your mentee to recognize their strengths and build self-confidence by using specific examples and actionable advice.

Role B – Junior Engineer
You’ve been feeling unsure about your abilities and are hesitant to take on new responsibilities.
Your goal: Share your concerns and be open to feedback and guidance.

Suggested Openers

Mentor:

  • “Hey, I’ve been really impressed with your recent work, but I noticed you seem a bit hesitant during meetings. Can we talk about how you’re feeling?”
  • “I wanted to check in on how your projects are going. Are there specific areas where you feel less confident?”

Junior Engineer:

  • “Thanks for noticing. I’ve been second-guessing myself a lot, especially when it comes to making technical decisions.”
  • “I appreciate you asking. I’m just worried about making mistakes and how that might affect the team.”

Sample Roleplay in Action

Mentor:
“Hey, I’ve been really impressed with your work on the recent feature update. However, I noticed you seemed hesitant to share your ideas during the last planning meeting. What’s been going through your mind?”

Junior Engineer:
“Thanks for saying that. I guess I’ve been second-guessing myself a lot. I worry that my suggestions might not be good enough, and I don’t want to steer the team in the wrong direction.”

Mentor:
“I get it. It’s important to remember that your perspective is valuable, and everyone makes mistakes. Can you recall a time when you contributed to a project and it turned out well?”

Junior Engineer:
“Yeah, there was that time when I suggested refactoring some code to improve performance, and it actually made a significant difference.”

Mentor:
“That’s a great example! You identified a problem and provided a solution that benefited the team. What can we do to help you feel more comfortable sharing your ideas moving forward?”

Junior Engineer:
“Maybe I could start by preparing a bit more before meetings, so I feel more confident in what I’m saying.”

Mentor:
“That sounds like a solid plan. How about I also give you a chance to lead a small part of the next meeting? It could be a good opportunity to practice speaking up in a supportive environment.”

Junior Engineer:
“I’d like that. It sounds a bit intimidating, but I think it could really help.”

Mentor:
“Excellent. Let’s check in after the meeting to see how it went and discuss any feedback. You’ve got a lot to offer, and I’m here to support you every step of the way.”

Post-Scenario Tools

Curveball Mode (Optional)

Throw in one of these mid-roleplay to test adaptability:

  • The engineer expresses doubt about receiving negative feedback in the past.
  • The engineer is reluctant to acknowledge their past successes.
  • The engineer frequently compares themselves to more experienced peers.

Reflection Checklist

As the Mentor:

  • Did you provide specific examples of the mentee’s strengths?
  • Did you offer actionable steps to build confidence?
  • Did you encourage open communication and support?

As the Junior Engineer:

  • Did you share your concerns openly?
  • Did you acknowledge your past successes?
  • Did you express a willingness to take actionable steps forward?

Common Mistakes to Avoid

  • Over-reassuring without addressing specific concerns
  • Focusing too much on negatives rather than strengths
  • Offering generic advice without actionable steps

Pro Tip

Confidence builds over time with small wins. Encourage your mentee to celebrate their successes and learn from every experience, big or small.